Copyright Adam Schlosser
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Copyright 2005 Adam Schlosser


Posted by Pip

B17- The Hermit

The feared Hermit is revealed! Way back when Balance visited the Tarot's domain, Content was seen petting a lizard and on page TG24, Temperance and the Hanged Man brought it back to Emp. A plan Emp apparently thought was more of a blow than recruiting Lust's own clone and second-in-command, but maybe the cuteness of lizardy evil will be enough to help erase this messed up world from existence.


Quick Review: Spider-Man: Ends of the Earth- A villain-centric story and art by Ramos, so I'm in on the latest Spider-Man collection. For as much of the story it entails, Doc Oc's global plan is kind of dumb. He implements it well, goes to Batman levels of planning and preparing for contingencies, and plots for the heroes well, but the overarching scheme is rather pedestrian. What he had available in just the set up for the plan would have been more than enough and he could have activated it from the get-go and pretty much won. Throughout the entire book, he didn't have a good reason to expand upon what was already working and then at the end we got a bit of a “drag people down more before finishing them off”, which as we have discussed far too may times already, is stupid. The ending also kind of craps out because of how bad the plan was. Spider-Man wins the day and overcomes the final obstacle... because? The dialogue basically comes down to:
Bad guy: "You couldn't have been able to do that!"
Hero: "Well, I did it anyway!"
And of course, a character "dies" at the end of the book, but has already been mentioned as alive in the current issues, so hey, why care about any of them. The Ramos-drawn pages are fantastic and if you can ignore the stupidity of some aspects, the story is great and really boosts its villains and drags the heroes through some serious travails, but I couldn't help but focus on what a story that threatens the very globe means in mainstream superhero comics. Marvel comics are so intertwined that of course Doc Oc is going to lose and the planet is going to be fine. If he actually succeeded, how many comics would be affected and have to stop? There's no drama and for every issue that ended with a hero in a bad spot, you know everybody major is going to be just fine. The only real drama comes when the comic brings in some heroes I've never heard of before because you know there's actual danger involved. And some of them die and it's great. One of them gets offed and I was so happy because the villain that killed it was actually smart. But on the global picture, obviously nothing will change in this world changing event. And Spider-man now has a pretty much foolproof way to beat Sandman. Granted, it was a well-written and designed plan, but Sandman is no longer a viable villain. This gets to a larger problem and the one I harp on in EVERY superhero comic book review. Spider-Man has been fighting the same villains for 50 years now. Ignoring the fact that Spider-Man started out as a teenager and now 50 years later he's in his what, late 20s, superhero comic books with unlimited runs are pointless. Spider-Man is in a death trap, will he make it?! Of course he will. Lizard is threatening people, can Spider-Man save the day?! Yep. Just like Wolverine is always going to heal up or be brought back from the dead, Hulk is going to smash things until all is up with the status quo again, Batman is going to stop Two-Face, Superman is going to foil Lex Luthor, and some member of the Fantastic Four will die/quit/go crazy and eventually wind up back on the team A-okay.
And Star Wars references don't work how comic writers think they do. Having Peter quote Han Solo once an issue isn't witty, funny, or a nod to "Spider-Man is a geek, like me!" it's just lazy writing.