Copyright Adam Schlosser

Copyright 2005 Adam Schlosser

Posted by Pip

ST24- Fist Blanket

Yeeesh. Even chloroforming the gal would have been a kinder way of knocking her out. Granted time and supply constraints kind of limited Lust’s options and Fortune WAS going nuclear meltdown, but our favorite Sin owes our favorite Tarot a hug or two when this is done. Or maybe you just get tired of talking people down from the brink over the years...

To those of you not well-versed in the Links page, Sins had a cameo in Crossworlds! However! It’s in a freaky and bizarre way that may shatter perceptions of reality and make children cry. So click away!

However, we do have a problem. Nobody on their forum acknowledged Fortune and Lust’s mighty presence! Smite them! In a polite and acceptable way.

Quick Reviews:
Extras Season 2- Man, if there was ever a show that crashed quickly. Pretty much every character except Andy got ludicrously wacky and uninteresting, the plots got stupid, and they drove almost everything funny about the first season into the ground. It’s kind of meta and all because it reflects what’s happening in Andy’s life, but as a viewer, that’s not entertaining. The situations that make the characters squirm are drawn out and taken way too far. There are times when the show devolves into slapstick. It went from an intelligent and funny show to jokes about poop and masturbation. I really wish I was kidding about that but there’s a five minute scene about poop that ends with a character getting it on his face, an entire episode devoted to homophobia (whose only redeeming scene with Ian McKellen matching Patrick Stewart’s hilariously out-of-character performance from season 1), and a long, completely unfunny discussion about masturbation.

Soul Calibur 4- As an actual fighting game, Soul Calibur has probably one of the worst control schemes, an over-reliance on blocking, an absurd number of things to memorize, and an overall complete lack of fun. There are times when you can blaze through the entire game using only one button and other times where you won't be able to stand up because your opponent juggles you in the air for half the battle and then when you finally do hit the ground you'll be battered and unable to even get to your knees. The story mode is incredibly short (a mere five matches of varying lengths) and they either changed the control scheme or changed the moves around because there were things I could do in the DC version of SC1 that can't do here. The online system is pretty meh. You get a lot of “failure to connect”s when trying to join a fight, there’s no level matching when fighting an unranked battle so you could go against somebody you won’t be able to even touch or somebody playing the game for the very first time, and out of the four matches I played, three of them were against people using Killik and they all just did the same two moves over and over. So yeah, online play really leaves a vile taste in your mouth. Why the hell did I even rent this game? Character creator! Your options are pretty lacking when you first start the game and they made the ludicrously bad decision to tie your character's stats to what he/she is wearing, so you have to choose between making a character that looks neat or making a character that can actually fight. I made mine and while the outfit is cool, she's so weak that she starts every battle at 50% health. Overall, the game is completely forgettable but I got to make 3D fightin' versions of some of the Sins, so enjoy!

Funnily enough, my favorite move is called "Embrace of Lust" so that gets it an extra point or two.