Copyright Adam Schlosser

Copyright 2005 Adam Schlosser

Posted by Pip

ST28- CoelaSpawnCanthers

What could ruin a nice float at sea quicker than being reduced to eating unappetizing fish? Well, being bound and gagged by your friends would probably at least match it in unpleasantness.
And before anybody points it out, just because Lust CAN morph herself a tan if she wants it, that doesn’t make enjoying the sun any less of a pleasant experience.

Hopefully Bluehost has finished ravaging our server because our FTP access is back. The preview of this month’s wallpaper is posted in the last page’s notes, there’s a new DDG, Spiral should have updated, and Tara will be updating soon-like. Whew! That’s a lot of FTP-age.

Quick Review: Iron Man- Quick, quick review to get it out of the way: It’s a good comicbook movie, but not great. It’s mainly just CG and stuff blowing up, so it’s nowhere near as good as something like the new Batman movies, but it’s a far sight better than the lame new Spider-Man movies. The deeper issues it has are mainly the characters themselves. The whole movie has this feeling of “cool stuff overload”. By the time they get to the third suit, I’m already “man that robot is awesome”’d out. There’s only so much excitement I can expend on cool technology. Yeah it looks great and everything but I get spent on it quickly and then it all feels like wave after wave of impressive but hollow... stuff. As for Tony himself, he’s just not an interesting character. He’s too smart, too good at everything. Every single problem he comes across, he just invents something to fix that problem. It’s like Mr. Fantastic. Whenever a new challenge presents itself, they just create a new device to stop it because they can do anything. Giant alien? Just build a new ray gun to zap it to another dimension. Really strong bad guy? Just invent a laser to sap its power. Shards of metal in your heart? Just invent a glowy tube and you no longer need to even mention it. Characters like Spider-Man and Batman are detectives. They can’t just “make” a solution to their problems (not counting the Adam West Batman that had a gadget for everything). They have to deduce what to do, find a way around problems, and rely on skill and tact to not die. Sure Bats has uber-tech to get around some issues, but he still has to do the footwork and keep it kind of realistic (the cell phone sonar computer spy thing from the new movie was at least semi-believable). Iron Man may well as not even have Tony Stark. Just stick Jarvis in control of the suit and make some other robots or technology and they could do the exact same thing. It doesn’t take skill to trick shot the terrorists holding the villagers at gunpoint; he just has his suit’s auto-targeting do it for him. I think that one example epitomizes why I don’t like the character of Iron Man. *I* could do all that stuff if I had a supersuit, anybody could. On the other hand, I don’t know every form of martial arts ever even dreamed of, nor could I chemically analyze a leaf and find out that it contains a speck of goo only found at one specific Gotham poisoned junk yard, so I have to respect Bruce Wayne for being able to do that. I actually think the featurette on the disc about how Iron Man has evolved over the years was just as interesting as the movie itself. And Pepper Potts was annoying as heck. What is it with the “normal” women in comic movies? If they don’t have their own powers or booberific impossible figures and costumes, they wind up being poorly written and grating. The Betties from the Hulk movies, MJ from Spider-Man, Lois in Superman, and the Rachels in Batman are all people I would leave tied to the tracks or plummeting from the skyscraper and go rescue someone else.