Copyright Adam Schlosser

Copyright 2005 Adam Schlosser

Posted by Pip

VOD18- Neck Hug

Heeey, Rhett normally doesnít have a big olí gash in his forehead. Something about this seems suspicious. Anger was just trying to make up for past deeds and misunderstandings with a little love, but heís viciously rebuffed. No wonder the poor bloke is so testy. At least Murdi gets a hug. A little higher and a lot tighter than heíd likely pick if given the choice, but you donít look a gift hug in the throttling.

Are you boring? Lazy? Love Sins but are too sad to pick up a pencil and draw something? Well fret no longer, Slapegg! May I introduce... Make Your Own Vice: Humanoid Edition! All you need to do is fire it up, assemble your parts, and gawk in awe. Take a screenshot with the PrtScrn key on your keyboard and color it in or edit it with whatever image programs you have on hand for even more dazzling results! Make a nice one and I'll post it, if you want!

The Pipening continues over at Sailor Sun, so click that link up top and support the take over of all things Sin.

Quick Review: Tomb Raider Underworld- Every time a new Tomb Raider comes out, I always get my hopes up, tell myself I like the series, and within five minutes of renting it, Iím cursing a blue streak. The graphics and visuals are fantastic. Climb to the top of an area, then turn around and have a gander and itís gorgeous. The water, the trees, the thereís-no-conceivable-way-ancient-civilations-could-have-built-that structures and temples; it all just looks amazing. However, gameplay-wise, the series still has EVERY. SINGLE. problem the games have had since they first came out. The combat is boring, the camera is unresponsive, and the controls are awful. Thankfully, the game has its own dipswitches for combat, so you can ramp up your own strength and decrease the enemiesí and just blaze through the tedious fighting. Sadly, the camera does not feature such ďfor the love of God, stop sucking!Ē style features. The first thing youíll notice is how twitchy the camera is. You canít turn around, jump, swing, or move more than five steps without the camera wildly jumping around or spinning. More than ten minutes of play actually gives me headaches. Youíll be making an inexcusable number of leaps of faith solely because you canít get the camera to move and let you see anything useful, it will get stuck in walls or trees, or the view zooms uncomfortably close to Laraís face or chest. Yes, Lara has a great figure, but given the choice between gawking at the wonders of HD wetsuit on huge breasts technology or being able to see the flimsy outcropping I need to jump to lest I fall several stories and snap my neck on the jagged rocks below, boobs just barely lose out in importance. I had far more problems with the controls than I did in Legends. Even if you have a jump lined up perfectly, Lara will defy physics and somehow shift and spaz in the air and then completely miss a jump or grab. Even on totally easy jumps that I could make in real life, Lara will just freak the hell out, come crashing to the ground, and either A) die in a glorious display of ragdoll physics (grant yourself bonus points for the number of times her face smashes into rocks on the way down) or B) fall to an earlier part of the stage and thus totally invalidate your last five minutes of work. Option A is actually the better one because then you have a slim chance of there being a checkpoint close to the last jump and you wonít have wasted quite so much time. After running into Option B four times in a row on the same exact three-foot jump, I decided it just wasnít worth the frustration and sent the game back. I just needed to jump from a beam to an overhang that was directly in front of her, but every time she would jump at the edge of the structure, not grab it, and fall to an earlier part of the stage. I really, really wanted to play the game too. The story isnít bad in that same silly Tomb Raider way, the music is surprisingly great, and the locations and puzzles are a lot of fun, but if the core mechanics and the camera are THAT bad, thereís just no helping the game.
Sins Committed: Bad Camera, Bad Controls