Posted by Pip
D12- Built The Pyramehds
Sloth starts to reveal its dastardly ways. Oh it looks cute and harmless, but it’s really in control and can bend the Sins to its whim! Or Lust just has more of a relationship with him and talks more... But that’s not fun, so supervillain theory ahoy.
A new DDG has been posted as well! With villainy as well. I sense a theme.
Quick Review: Prince of Persia- I’ve never been a big fan of the PoP games and the new one isn’t doing anything to change that. The main character is just some dude. A “witty” 90s sitcom dude. A dude that makes the highly questionable decision of wearing something over one of his eyes. If my job entailed leaping over countless pits and swinging from things and making lots and lots of spatially-related decisions, I would make sure I had as much depth perception as I could have. The Prince and other characters are very grating and unlikable and the dialogue is boring and slow so you’ll ignore most of the story. Without forcing yourself to listen to the extra dialogue, the story is really just “evil god wants to destroy stuff”. The gameplay doesn’t fair much better. Combat is a button mash-a-thon and the game seems to be stuck in a never ending tutorial. Two hours into it, it’s STILL telling you how to jump and do the moves you’ve been doing over and over. You also “dial in” moves so if you press Jump while jumping, your character will jump again when it touches the ground and, most likely, fling himself into a pit after doing so. It’s finicky as well, so you’ll easily accidentally tap a direction, so when you hit the ground or grab a pole, the dude will then turn or move, again most likely into a pit. You feel like you’re fighting with the character every step of the way because the game doesn’t “flow”. You move from obstacle A to obstacle B to obstacle C rather than moving around the world at a natural pace and having the obstacles just be a part of the journey.
I didn’t bother to beat it. I completed the first four areas and unlocked a new “power” and opened the next group of areas, but it was more of the same. Every area is just a sea of poles, beams, and wall running floating over a giant bottomless pit.
You don’t get a sense of WHY the world is the way it is. Why would you build a world full of wall rings, bottomless pits, random poles sticking out of the ceiling or walls, etc, etc? The very first thing on an architect’s mind should be pretty simple: Is the building location above a bottomless pit? If yes, you probably shouldn’t stick a castle there.
Sins committed: Bad story, Bad writing, Bad characters, Bad camera, Bad controls, Tedious gameplay