Copyright Adam Schlosser
Contact:
aschloss@gmail.com


Copyright 2005 Adam Schlosser


Posted by Pip

AD26- Cue The Shoe Shopping Montage

Greed is such a bimbo. You may remember that last time Lust got him to possess a cute lady too. So either he found that it works really well or we're exploring dark places in the psyche of our lovable puppy-man. At we know he hasn't gone too far down the bunny hole if he still approves of questionable, if slightly acceptable, child-napping. Rhett and Lust may not get the enthusiastic thumbs-up when he finds that Addy is coming along voluntarily and isn't going to be used to run an orphan thief ring. Hey, my nickname is “Pip”, don't judge me for being for the Dickensian horrors of orphanhood.

There's been a major several weeks update of the Dutch pages uploaded to the Foreign Language section of the gallery. Check them out to convince people that you're wordly.


Quick Reviews: GTA 4: Episodes From Liberty City: Lost and the Damned- A bunch of dirtbag bikers don't make for the most compelling protagonists. Niko was a bad guy, sure, but he was at least a likeable bad guy and you got the feeling that he was going somewhere and was doing bad things to move forward in life. The characters in Lost are just assholes and are happy with that lot. Your AI partners are braindead. On the very first side mission I could do, I watched my partner T-bone a car that was stopped at a red light, flip his bike, get crushed by it, and be unable to get back on it for a while. That doesn't instill confidence in them. In regular missions, they'll drive in front of you, walk in front of your gun while you're firing, they have the accuracy of a Cobra soldier, and it's damned hard to ride in a group because they stop and start and swerve around so erratically that you just can't stay in position. The game has aged incredibly poorly in such a short period of time. The draw-in rate is terrible with entire streets popping into existence in front of you, textures not loading, blurry textures when they do appear, and just some generally ugly models and aliasing. You can get the draw-in rate to freak out just by walking forward and then turning around and walking back where you came from. The worst instance was when I was fleeing from the cops, turned down a street, and came to a dead stop after I smashed into thin air. It took five or six seconds but a dumpster finally loaded and that's why I was stopped. I thought GTA4 looked so awesome when it came out, so either they cut corners on this one or the PS3 has made some leaps and bounds in just two years. There's no balance to the missions. The on-foot fights are a piece of cake but the bike missions are exceptionally hard and it can be completely random whether you'll complete a gang war. Your partners are absolutely useless because they can't drive, they can't hit the broadside of a barn, and they'll run towards cars that are about to blow up. Since you're almost always on a bike and your opponents are in cars, the playing field is completely uneven. They can force you off the road but you bounce off of them and they're protected by their vehicle but you're out in the open. In one mission, I took out 3 of the 4 enemy cars and then a 5th one appeared from off camera, shot me once with a shotgun which took away at least 2/3 of my health and killed me right then and there. It's a requirement to have body armor for every mission which just adds an extra annoying step of driving to the weapons store before every single mission. Without a good story and without decent characters, LatD is nothing more than what people complain GTA is. It's mindless violence with unnecessary sex, cursing, and drugs just for the sake of having violence, sex, cursing, and drugs.