Copyright Adam Schlosser

Copyright 2005 Adam Schlosser

Posted by Pip

MRL38- Marlegeddon

It takes time before you can handle the ability to explode heads or rain down fiery doom on a planet. Pride has years of forcing down her destructive impulses to to bring down a cosmic body to crush the bug walking near her sandwich. Maybe she's just mad that Jealous-Pride doesn't have any hair. That's one of her fanciest features!
From here, we'll close the book on Marlowe and leave him to hit the temples in peace and move on to a better life. Hopefully free of kidnappings, threatened beatings, and trans-dimensional throw-downs but still full of hugs and cookies. All while a little voice in the back of his mind tells him to hook up with the Tarot once more...

Marlie and Jealousy's bios have been added to the Cast page too!

Quick Review: 1000 Tiny Claws- Claws has a fun art style and a cute female pirate character making the characters the best part of another lackluster Mini. The story is told through cinematics that are well-drawn, written, and told that will make up your sole driving force to continue playing. The characters speak in a Simslish way that offers some bizarre charm when they say the occasional name in normal English, but it just doesn't work as a whole and I'd rather they had been silent or just spoken normally. The gameplay is the least interesting part of the game. It's not a game that you look forward to playing or something you'll ever say "just ten more minutes!" about. You play the levels as a means to see more of the characters, dialogue, and bonuses. You have a three-hit combo for combat but it's better to not use it. You leave yourself open to attack at the end of it, so unless you're only up against a single enemy, you're going to get hit from the side after you finish. The initial attack is quick and does the job just fine. The game has a major problem with diagonals. Enemies can move in all directions but you can't and the hit detection on your weapon is bad to begin with and only gets worse if you're not dead-on in front of an enemy, leading to not just cheap hits but also unfair deaths. It's a lot of plodding button mashing against hordes of enemies that are faster, more maneuverable, and will regularly beat the tar out of you from off-camera. I gave up on the fourth “boss” (every other boss is just “beat a lot of regular enemies rather than a new character) out of five worlds from just how frustrating and utterly lacking in fun the gameplay is. Dying over and over from a hit I couldn't see by an enemy that isn't in view doesn't do an already repetitive game any favors. Not to mention that your character shouts every time she attacks. Every. Time. And that's really all the game is. Attacking and shouting. It's a game poorly thought out with such bad implementation of its ideas that playing it puts me in a terrible mood and makes me angry. You know, more so than usual. It's even worse because the characters and story are cute and funny so you want to keep playing but then the gameplay is just so horrendous. I would love to see MediaTonic stop selling games and just sell animated shorts or comics or something. They have the art and writing skills but terrible game designers or programmers.
And on a side note, compare a picture of Rana, your character in the game, to a piece of fan art that WhiteRabbit did of Lust dressed up in a pirate costume some time ago:
WhiteRabbit has permission to glare disapprovingly at them.